"Selfish" by JAWNY is a song about the complexities of relationships and the conflicting emotions that come with them. The lyrics depict a sense of vulnerability and confusion as the narrator grapples with their feelings for someone. The song begins with the narrator acknowledging that the person they used to care about has now become someone they want to distance themselves from. They mention taking the subway to Tasker Morris, possibly a metaphor for a journey away from the person in question. Despite trying to move on, they find themselves walking slowly and constantly reminded of the memories they shared. The lyrics then delve into the narrator's fear of being trapped by their own emotions and how those feelings might resurface when they encounter reminders of the past. They question if it's selfish to only want someone when they feel helpless or when they are driven by physical desire. The narrator seeks understanding, asking if anyone can help them make sense of these conflicting emotions. In the following verses, the narrator expresses their frustrations with the way they are treated by the person they are in love with. They feel like a burden and rely on intermediaries to communicate, highlighting the lack of direct connection between them. Despite this, the narrator still holds on, hoping for some form of acknowledgment or care from the person they love. The lyrics also touch on the narrator's struggles with self-esteem and their own imperfections. They mention losing their wallet and feeling regret for sending a text message while intoxicated. These incidents highlight their own personal turmoil and attempts to find closure. The song concludes with a bittersweet realization that despite their bitterness and resentment, they are still in love with the person. They celebrate their birthday in a somber way, listening to Mitski, and acknowledge that it is never fair but always true to feel this way. The narrator hopes that the person they love will ask if they are okay, indicating their desire for validation and a deeper connection. Overall, "Selfish" explores themes of love, vulnerability, and the complex emotions that arise in relationships. The song captures the conflicting desires, insecurities, and longing that can be present when someone is deeply invested in another person.
