The song "The Herpes Hazardous Harlet" by Scott Waldo tells the story of a wild and dangerous woman who causes trouble wherever she goes. The lyrics describe her as a risky and infectious person, using vivid and honest records to paint a picture of her chaotic and unpredictable nature. The song plays with dark and edgy imagery, with references to darker thoughts, one-liners like missiles, and swisher sweets while dishing out sugar cane like it's sickness. The song also references picking a side and choosing a flavor, indicating the unpredictability and capriciousness of the woman in question. The overall tone of the song is rebellious and confrontational, with a sense of defiance and independence.
