"As a Rule" by Gilbert O'Sullivan is a humorous song that explores the singer's thoughts and observations on certain societal norms and experiences. The lyrics touch upon various subjects, such as public displays of affection, smoking, and improbable animal combinations, all while reflecting the singer's personal preferences and opinions. In the first verse, the singer expresses their lack of prudishness but humorously comments on the sight of people engaging in intimate acts on stage. They suggest that the only appropriate response to such a sight is laughter, unless one is prepared with a raincoat as protection. The second verse brings up the topic of smoking. The singer claims that they never smoke while on duty, implying a sense of responsibility. However, they confess that if no one is watching, they sometimes indulge in smoking. They believe that life is short, and if they were to quit smoking completely, they humorously speculate that they might die from unrelated causes (like warts). The third verse takes on a more whimsical tone as the singer sarcastically muses about the possibility of crossbreeding an elephant with a kangaroo. They recall their mother's reaction, jokingly suggesting that next, pigs might be the next animals to perform on stage. These lines highlight the singer's evident sarcasm and wit. The following line questions the preference for blue skies over red skies, suggesting that the person advocating for blue skies may not be thinking rationally. The mention of a blue sky at night is used for comical effect, as it is an impossibility in reality. The final lines touch upon the singer's personal likes and dislikes. They dislike waiting and being in overcrowded subway trains, yet they enjoy having good wine with their dinner. The phrase "Yes we do" is likely a playful addition to show agreement and camaraderie with the audience. Overall, "As a Rule" is a lighthearted and comical song that presents Gilbert O'Sullivan's observations and opinions on various subjects, delivered through his distinct sense of humor.
